Marvel Reveals Two Secret Avengers

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CBR: Marvel Reveals Two Secret Avengers

Though my first guess was wrong about the character who turned out to be Beast, I'm still really excited to see him on this team. I feel like he's been a bit underutilized on the X-Men, and I always really liked the idea of him as an Avenger. This pick seems to indicate that the term "Secret" in the title doesn't indicate a "black ops" assassin team, given Beast's disapproval of the X-team equivalent, X-Force. Also, these teasers reveal that some of the details have been removed from the silhouettes to make their identities harder to guess. Nevertheless, I stand by most of my guesses from my previous posts, but I would like to talk a little more about the one character I couldn't pin down.

"I excel through adversity."
I still can't narrow this one down, but I do have a few more guesses. Captain Marvel (Noh-Varr) is still at the top of my list, though I express an increased degree of skepticism now that there's supposed to be a former Dark Avenger appearing in the new New Avengers line up. I'd also like to add Nova to my list of guesses, as the quote is definitely fitting for someone who's lived through Annihilation. That said, I expect this won't actually be the case. Honestly, the Avengers seem a little beneath him at this point - defending one corner of a single world isn't really much to write home about when you're regularly saving the galaxy. Not to mention it will make very little sense if he's hanging around Earth in Secret Avengers but is halfway around the Milky Way in his solo book or Realm of Kings. I know it's not new for characters to play double duty in multiple books, but the distances involved here seem to go beyond standard allowances of cognitive dissonance. Finally, now that Beast has been confirmed, I'd like to add Wonder Man to my list. We haven't seen him in a while, but he and Beast have a lot of history and make an amusing pair. I'm not sure he "excels through adversity," though he did die and come back to life once upon a time, so that's at least something in his favor. Time will tell, I suppose, I expect two more characters to be revealed tomorrow.

X-Men Legacy 234, X-Factor 203

Let's talk X-Men. Well, X-books, anyway. Both of these are essentially fulfilling the same role of passing the time between a previous arc and upcoming Second Coming tie-ins. Speaking of Second Coming, I'll likely not be reviewing each individual issue, but rather taking it in blocks of perhaps four or so issues.

X-Men Legacy 234
This issue is notable in that it's the first that really seems to focus on the "new direction" this book is supposed to be taking (which is to say, Rogue). At least, I assume it is, though it's still not really clear to me if it's just going to be about Rogue, or if it's supposed to be a Young/New X-Men replacement. At any rate, this one's about Rogue and how she gets around. Okay, that's sexist and unfair, but seriously, this issue's a little more soap opera heavy than your typical comic book. A plot contrivance requires Rogue to sap some of the Stepford Cuckoos' telepathic powers for the day. This complicates her encounters with the various romantic figures in her life; she has a heart to heart with Gambit, makes out with Magneto, and possibly catches some awkward stray thoughts from Iceman. She also finds time to help Indra start reconciling his moral beliefs and the nature of his powers. Though I'm honestly not sure how I'm supposed to feel about the whole situation, it seems to me that convincing a young man to dismiss pacifism and become comfortable with violence is a little irresponsible.

Basically, if you like Rogue and all that drama that comes with her, you'll likely enjoy this comic. If not, you're probably not going to find this particular outing very meaningful. Even the art's not much to write home about.

X-Factor 203
Another filler issue, this one featuring Strong Guy and Monet St. Croix. We're actually thrown into the middle of the story, as Monet has somehow been kidnapped and Strong Guy is hitting up the local drug kingpin in Generic South American Country for information on her whereabouts. As it turns out Monet and her father are being held captive by Baron Mordo, who wants to make use of Monet's Penance form in much the same way her brother Empath did, using her as a source of some vague life energy. Strong Guy dukes it out with some golems but apparently not before Mordo can successfully restore himself with Monet's help. And that's pretty much where this issue ends. It's not a bad story, but there's no indication that it's going to be continued in the next issue (which is supposedly a Second Coming tie-in), so we're basically left with a story with no beginning and no end. Art's pretty decent, though Strong Guys hands appear comically small next to his giant arms, even for a character for whom this tends to be typical. I did enjoy the Baron Mordo cameo, and I hope it implies a guest appearance by Dr. Strange in the near future. I guess what I'm saying is that the merit of this particular story will depend on whether it's successfully concluded in an upcoming issue or if it's ultimately tossed aside for the sake of Second Coming.

Dark Wolverine 84, New Mutants 11

Dark Wolverine 84
Garbage.


New Mutants 11
An interesting addition to the Siege line, Hela calls on Dani Moonstar to repay a favor she granted back in the “Utopia” story line in Uncanny X-Men and Dark Avengers. She tasks Dani with collecting the souls of dead gods and bringing them to Hel. See, normally the dead go to Valhalla, in Asgard, but since these folks were already in Valhalla and died again, they have to go to Hel. Which is, I assume, different than Hell (that extra “l” makes all the difference). I don't know how any of this holds with Norse mythology, but I can only assume it's previously established comic book lore, so let's just go with it. At any rate, Hela transforms Dani into a Valkyrie (which, oddly enough, still includes her X-Men “X”) and sends her off to the field of battle at Asgard. However, once she arrives, Dani decides to join the battle instead of performing her duties; this has tragic consequences in the form of the Dísir, creatures which prey upon the souls of dead gods. Realizing her mistake, Dani returns to her duties, defending the dead gods against the Dísir and escorting those still... “alive?” to Hel, though she is still roundly criticized afterward by an angry Hela. Overall, an enjoyable addition to both Siege and New Mutants, which sees Dani grappling with her impetuous and often violent nature. My only to nits to pick with this issue are these: first, I'm not a fan of the manga-esque art style (though this is more a reflection of personal taste than the artist's competence); and second, the other New Mutants are portrayed as being too busy gambling to care about the news coming from Asgard, which seems a bit out of character.

Dark Wolverine 84
I guess I should write an actual review, but Jesus, what the hell did I just read? And why? This book was so bad I can't even crack jokes about it. It was so bad I don't even want to review it. It's so bad, when it sits around the house, it sits around the house. Wait, I think I got mixed up. At any rate, what should be apparent at this point is that I hated this issue. Daken has turned into one big anti-hero cliché, and the writers seem determined to ride that train right into the ground. In terms of the plot, there is absolutely no reason for the Fates to be involved with Daken other than to give this book an excuse to tie in to Siege and piggyback off its sales. Bullseye is pretty much completely out of character for the whole issue, and the art's atrocious. My recommendation: save your money for a decent Wolverine comic, I hear Wolverine: Weapon X is quite enjoyable.

Uncanny X-Men 522

Meh. Absolutely nothing happens in this issue that wasn't telegraphed in the last. Actually, not a whole lot happens in this issue, period. Magneto brings Kitty Pryde back, but if you read the last issue, you already know that. The X-Club strings scientific sounding words together into nonsensical phrases; something about making satellites hallucinate so they don't detect the giant bullet of impending doom returning to Earth (I guess that sort of thing makes people nervous). With a final act of will Magneto pulls Kitty from the bullet as it passes through the planet. But wait, there's a twist! Kitty can't unphase, so she sinks to the center of the Earth. That last part's not true, but this contrivance certainly draws attention to the glaring logical errors that are inherent in Kitty Pryde's power set. And hasn't this exact plot device been used with Kitty before? Like, 30 years ago? Now Nightcrawler needs to get injured so the pair of them can move to the UK and form a team that's actually worth reading about.

Overall, a lackluster end to a meandering store arc. The art's mediocre (why the heck is Kitty's outfit clinging to her cleavage?) and there's a bonus story tacked on to the end that's equally boring. Fraction spends most of the issue dumbing down the dialogue of supporting characters so Cyclops sounds smart. I'm actually kind of impressed that Fraction managed to take the return of a mainstay, fan-favorite character and make it so thoroughly uninteresting. Here's hoping Second Coming is more enjoyable, but I won't hold my breath.